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How's this for breaking news? For once I have some gossip and it even involves me!
G and I are getting married during the Christmas holidays, before the 31st of December, so that it'll benefit us come income tax time. ^_^
The truth is, it's really only for practical reasons that we're doing it, otherwise I wouldn't. Religion plays no part in it for us and by next May the government would consider us, for all intents and purposes, married anyway; it's because it'll be much easier overseas for me, since many countries don't recognize common-law marriage.
As for the whole "wedding" part of it, having a big shindig with lots of guests is really not for me and even the social aspects of marriage make me kind of leery of the whole thing, though now that Canada recognizes same-sex marriages, I don't have to feel there's anything unjust about it. It annoys me that to many, this would "legitimize" our relationship, as if living together and building a life together don't count as much without the official document. I'm hardly the type to jump into things, so when I moved into Château Punkie, it was marriage enough for me. Since then, though, I've been longing for an English equivalent to "conjoint(e)" that doesn't sound as impersonal as "partner". In Japanese I've been calling him my shujin, because boifurendo just isn't enough.
We'd discussed rings and I'd said I didn't want any. First of all, I don't wear rings. If I did, I wouldn't want gold and I am morally squicked out by the diamond industry (yeah, those De Beers ads look nice, but... *shudder* And those right-hand diamond rings are the dumbest idea I ever heard). I also object to the idea that an expensive ring shows his love, as I could think of plenty of better things to do with that money. All that was rendered moot, however, when G's mother very touchingly gave us her and G's father's wedding rings. They're both platinum, with their names engraved inside the bands (so I have Lim Jit Beng in mine) and mine fits me perfectly. G had to get his resized, as his father apparently had much smaller fingers than he does. And even though mine has a diamond on it, it's a family heirloom now, which is the only way I could accept it.
My parent's reaction, when I said we'd just have a civil ceremony then go out to eat, amused me: my father asked if he was going to give me away (no) and my mother said she'd have to have a little reception at home for friends and family. And the S-K's (family friends since I was three or four years old) took me by surprise. Apparently, P and B (another one of those "never-officially-marrieds", like my parents) were crying and exclaiming about "Oh, remember when our girls were little and played dress-up together!" Andrea was quite excited and sounded really bouncy over the phone. But the kicker is that E (the grandmother, whom I now see once a year, at Christmas/Hanukkah) even called my parents to congratulate them! It's funny to think that something that's not such a big deal to me is getting others all worked up.
So, that's it. But because G is in Japan until mid-November, I have to do the practical stuff like finding out the where and when and how much it costs and all that. And make myself a dress. Perhaps two dresses, one for the ceremony and one for the restaurant. It seems standard, after all. Maybe even a third one for the little party at home? And something to go out partying. Yes, of course I'm just doing it for the dresses, why the surprise?
Another objection I had to the idea is that we'll never be able to thruthfully call our children "little bastards". XD
G and I are getting married during the Christmas holidays, before the 31st of December, so that it'll benefit us come income tax time. ^_^
The truth is, it's really only for practical reasons that we're doing it, otherwise I wouldn't. Religion plays no part in it for us and by next May the government would consider us, for all intents and purposes, married anyway; it's because it'll be much easier overseas for me, since many countries don't recognize common-law marriage.
As for the whole "wedding" part of it, having a big shindig with lots of guests is really not for me and even the social aspects of marriage make me kind of leery of the whole thing, though now that Canada recognizes same-sex marriages, I don't have to feel there's anything unjust about it. It annoys me that to many, this would "legitimize" our relationship, as if living together and building a life together don't count as much without the official document. I'm hardly the type to jump into things, so when I moved into Château Punkie, it was marriage enough for me. Since then, though, I've been longing for an English equivalent to "conjoint(e)" that doesn't sound as impersonal as "partner". In Japanese I've been calling him my shujin, because boifurendo just isn't enough.
We'd discussed rings and I'd said I didn't want any. First of all, I don't wear rings. If I did, I wouldn't want gold and I am morally squicked out by the diamond industry (yeah, those De Beers ads look nice, but... *shudder* And those right-hand diamond rings are the dumbest idea I ever heard). I also object to the idea that an expensive ring shows his love, as I could think of plenty of better things to do with that money. All that was rendered moot, however, when G's mother very touchingly gave us her and G's father's wedding rings. They're both platinum, with their names engraved inside the bands (so I have Lim Jit Beng in mine) and mine fits me perfectly. G had to get his resized, as his father apparently had much smaller fingers than he does. And even though mine has a diamond on it, it's a family heirloom now, which is the only way I could accept it.
My parent's reaction, when I said we'd just have a civil ceremony then go out to eat, amused me: my father asked if he was going to give me away (no) and my mother said she'd have to have a little reception at home for friends and family. And the S-K's (family friends since I was three or four years old) took me by surprise. Apparently, P and B (another one of those "never-officially-marrieds", like my parents) were crying and exclaiming about "Oh, remember when our girls were little and played dress-up together!" Andrea was quite excited and sounded really bouncy over the phone. But the kicker is that E (the grandmother, whom I now see once a year, at Christmas/Hanukkah) even called my parents to congratulate them! It's funny to think that something that's not such a big deal to me is getting others all worked up.
So, that's it. But because G is in Japan until mid-November, I have to do the practical stuff like finding out the where and when and how much it costs and all that. And make myself a dress. Perhaps two dresses, one for the ceremony and one for the restaurant. It seems standard, after all. Maybe even a third one for the little party at home? And something to go out partying. Yes, of course I'm just doing it for the dresses, why the surprise?
Another objection I had to the idea is that we'll never be able to thruthfully call our children "little bastards". XD
